I'll be back soon, sorry! Life's a mess atm :/

I’m in pain… “Real pain”, not only mental pain but also physical pain…. My neck and head hurts like hell and living in my mother’s bf house is also like living in hell… Why? He is a fucking alcoholic who does cocaine and he has an awful personality…. Right now I hate him so much :’/ He triggers me all the time. He likes to punch funiture and make loud awful sounds all the damn time just to ‘show’ who’s the boss around…. That “thing” alone triggers some of my PTSD symptoms (like anxiety, dissociation, SH urges, etc)… :( And… I’ve been dealing with terrible neck and back pain and also headaches for the last four days and I even went to the hospital because I could barely move or walk….And whenever I ask my mom to help me with the things I cannot do because of my physical condition he gets all mad and says “she is not giving him enough attention….” Yesterday the pain made me go to the ER crying and when I got back from the hospital I was still in pain…and it was an excruciating pain then I asked my my mother to help me to lay down so I could rest and take the medication and her bf almost threw a tantrum because she stayed with me in my room for about 15 minutes… And I heard him saying “why you’re talking to her, you two probably talked in the hospital”…. WHAT THE FUCK???? I was and I’m in PAIN you bastard! How could I talk to my mother when I was crying in a fucking hospital????? The doc said I’m having this neck/back pain because I work too much (aka I spend too much time in front of the computer)…. Sadly he didn’t give me any “good” painkiller so I’m still in pain =/

I haven’t replied to a few messages yet, so I’d like to apologize. My dear friends I’m not really okay… I need to recover soon because I have so much work to do… Oh god, do I really deserve all this pain? =/

I know I’m already 22 yo, but I’m a human being in pain and I need help to recover *sighs*

I know I’m not being selfish =/ HE is being selfish. Whenever he got ‘sick’ I would even tell my mom to take care of him and now… He just does’t give a single fuck about my condition. He acts like I’m not even here. I can’t wait to have enough money to go away. But first I need to get better and get back to work…. =/

I’m medicated right now (*muscle relaxant pill and pain killers*) soo I probably made a mess while typing =/

victoriousvocabulary:

bunny & books 

victoriousvocabulary:

bunny & books 

bleedingwinter:

but why?

bleedingwinter:

but why?

sirenboy:

image

dude i hope you know that “je suis le pain” translates into “i am the bread”

victoriousvocabulary:

DOLORIFUGE
[noun]
something that banishes or mitigates grief; a cure for pain.
Etymology: dolor (sorrow, grief, misery or anguish, derived from Latin) + -fuge (expelling or dispelling either a specified thing or in a specified way, derived from Latin fugāre - to expel, put to flight).
[Gustave Doré - Opium Smoking]

victoriousvocabulary:

DOLORIFUGE

[noun]

something that banishes or mitigates grief; a cure for pain.

Etymology: dolor (sorrow, grief, misery or anguish, derived from Latin) + -fuge (expelling or dispelling either a specified thing or in a specified way, derived from Latin fugāre - to expel, put to flight).

[Gustave Doré - Opium Smoking]

porpentine:

i’m into really low commitment hangouts like lying on the floor near each other or falling asleep together or falling into an endless void together

princess-neville:

making fun of girls for having “daddy issues” is literally the most illogically cruel thing i can think of haha “hey you! your dad sucked! i bet that really impacted your life and the way you form relationships with other people lmfao fuckin loser” 

dignitea:

my life is a joke and i’m not laughing anymore